When we find ourselves at a place in our lives that is unmanageable, we have to learn to draw upon aspects of ourselves that we normally don’t. It is difficult to make progress, regain health, find happiness, cultivate peace and be the person we know ourselves to be at our core, if we cannot unlock new ways of being. Moving forward often means rediscovering the Aspects of our Shiny Soul that we have forgotten.
Old patterns of behaviour and thought will always lead us to the same lessons, over and over, and away from love, if we do not choose to open up to new territory that lies within. We must do what we can to attend to the various aspects of our Shiny Souls – the emotional, physical, psychological, intellectual, creative, intuitive, energetic, spiritual and psychic capacities that make each of us unique. And, most importantly, we must find our Blind Spot – the most underutilized part of us – and engage it in order to be whole again.
All of us forget about certain aspects of ourselves as we get older. We no longer explore, develop and discover our true nature as we did as children. We turn to what comes most naturally and easily to us, especially in time of stress. In extreme cases we may use only one or two aspects of ourselves almost exclusively. That is when we run the risk of having prolonged and difficult health and wellness challenges.
Maybe you are relying on one aspect of you more than others? Can you step back and consider which of the aspects of your Shiny Soul you are overly attached to? Often, we find ourselves constantly falling into a few familiar patterns of thinking and behaving while never exploring other ways of managing our life circumstances. Consider these possible indications of a particularly narrow focus in life:
Some emotionally charged people wear their hearts on their sleeves and can never step out of a constant barrage of feelings that they cannot process.
Others are stuck in their thoughts – well worn psychological grooves of worry and anger – that keep them stagnated.
Many people are on a constant physical adrenaline rush – living life in the extreme – and rely solely on the energy around them to function and feel alive.
Some might tend to look at life solely through an intellectual lens, always trying to strategize, figure things out and make things conform to their expectations or viewpoints.
If we are too focussed on exploring our creativity we run the risk of not attending to the mundane but necessary duties in life.
If we only draw on our intuition in times of duress, we can sometimes not develop the tools we need to avoid the same situation in the future.
Those who are singularly spiritually focussed may forget to experience this life in ways that are healthy and grounded.
People who are too open energetically can be carried along on an unrelenting wave of life that smashes them to shore before pulling them back to the depths again.
If we are overly tuned in psychically, we may neglect all that is needed to ensure good health in our physical world.
There is no reason to be upset with ourselves for living in our default(s). It is normal. Not only that, it feels safe to us even when it is causing our experience of life to be less satisfying or more painful than it could be. If we want to feel better and crawl out of any crisis in our well-being, we have to realize there is so much more to each of us that we can open up to.
Often, the aspects of our Shiny Souls that are contributing the most to keeping us in a state of ill health are not what we may think. For example, as a young person in chronic pain from Fibromyalgia, I assumed my physical body was weak or lacking and focussed mostly on physical changes such as restrictive nutrition, intense exercise, painful physical therapies, and potent medications. I figured I was taking great care of myself. Unfortunately, the pain got worse. I know now that there were two reasons my approach to healing was not working:
1) The Intention Behind my Approach to Healing
The intention behind my process of managing my pain was actually causing me more pain. Rather than thinking of it as an opportunity to care for and nurture myself, it was as if I was punishing myself, forcing myself to be better. That sent the message to every cell in my body that I was not good enough. And guess what happens when cells hear that? They live up to the hype. They deteriorate. Not only that but because my body believed it was lacking it set up immune and nervous system defenses to protect itself. Those processes required immense energy and wore me down further. I was on a ride that I could not seem to stop or redirect.
2) My Blind Spot in my Approach to Healing
Healing through Fibromyalgia was a brutal, extensive period in my life, no doubt. And today, I still require treatments to manage the symptoms at times. But, in the end, my marathon pain and the ineffectiveness of focussing on only some aspects of me pushed me to look deeper and embrace all of me. In time, as I focussed on various aspects of me beyond the physical – the emotional and spiritual for example – I started to blossom into the healthy person inside. And, in time, I came to understand the real root of my ongoing physical pain – my blind spot – which was a tendency to have no energetic boundaries. I was subjecting myself to energetic junk all the time. It was only when I discovered and learned to protect my energetic boundaries that I could really feel whole and happy again.
In my process of healing, I learned an important fact: there is nothing lacking in me. I am not weak, physically or otherwise. We must learn to seek out the lost parts of ourselves. And to understand that the aspect of ourselves that we might consider to be most sick is actually a brave warrior trying to hold everything together, for us! It is picking up the slack of other aspects of us that are dormant, bogged down, underutilized or ignored. Focussing on the aspect of ourselves that is suffering the most actually makes things worse. Already, it is stretched to the limit of its capacity and is trying to make up for the other aspects of us just as uncorrected poor vision in one eye will weaken the other as it forces it to overcompensate.
The aspects of us that are not holding up their part of the bargain are not lacking either. We don’t need to build them up or change them. All we need to do is notice and reveal them; revel in all the newness that embracing those aspects of us can bring to our lives. With a little attention they will blossom. As the burden is lifted from the struggling aspect of ourselves, bit by bit, we will regain a wholeness that has always been there, waiting to be embraced.
To find out what your default(s) is, ask yourself:
1) Are there aspects of me that have become dominant and make my experience of life lop-sided and safe?
*If you still are not sure, or are having trouble being honest with yourself (we are all like that) ask someone you trust.
To identify your Blind Spot ask yourself:
1) Is there an aspect of me that scares me and which I tend to shy away from or ignore?
2) What parts of the people closest to me do I admire? Do I rely on them to make up for that aspect of me?
While it may seem overwhelming to try balancing out the various aspects of ourselves, it does not have to be. I am all about making things as easy as possible. There are ways of calling to the surface all of the aspects of us in a holistic way. Remember, it is not about fixing anything. It is about paying attention to something that you normally wouldn’t and watching it blossom under your care.
Initially, I tapped into all aspects of myself through songwriting and writing. It allowed me to rake through a lot of debris while engaging parts of me that I’d never valued before. In time, I found many ways of ‘being more of me’. I accessed aspects of me I did not know existed through Energy Therapies (Reiki, Bowen Therapy, Qigong, and Craniosacral Therapy, Medical Heilkunst), Meditation and Mindfulness. In these ways, which I found to be enjoyable, I learned to simply let go of layers and allow pieces of me to come back to the surface to be heard, seen, felt, and embraced. It was like reconciling the lost pieces of me. And, the more I continue to do that, the healthier I feel.
Just by doing something fun and creative once in awhile or taking a minute to notice how your body is reacting in the moment you will start to see yourself waking up to a more whole you. You will be tapping into underutilized parts of you. And, you will naturally depend less on the old standbys.
I promise 😀